The Ideal State To Have A Child Is Not To Be A Couple, It’s To Be Happy

The ideal state to have a child is not to have a partner. The most basic and unconditional foundation is to enjoy adequate inner well-being, to be a happy person who takes care of and enjoys himself. Thus, you will be worthy to give your children the best.

In our society it still has traditional and classic traits, and often patriarchal. With that comes the idea that every child who comes into the world needs to have a father and a mother as a reference. Of course, however, few things are more gratifying than conceiving a child with a loved one.

However, if there is no harmony in the couple, none of this makes sense.

Few things can be more devastating than a parent with unusual, disturbed behavior or clear emotional and psychological immaturity.

Having kids is very easy sometimes. The difficult thing is to get the child to become a person with good self-esteem, someone safe, dignified and courageous capable of being happy and giving happiness.

Therefore, there is no more ideal reference than a father or mother who is happy and who is able to give this new life its same values. They are those who have allowed themselves to be a strong and satisfied person who will guide your child in the best way. With or without a partner.

In “I’m Mama” we propose you to reflect on this together.

Happy parents happy children?

Happy parents happy children? Well, this sentence has some aspects that deserve to be concretized. Something we all know is that happiness is not a state, it is a dimension that comes and goes, that embraces us and, moments later, leaves us to test us at some point in the face of some adversity in different situations.

More than happy fathers and mothers,  it takes people with the right psychological and emotional strength. Let’s see in more detail.

our human quality

Human quality is not written on our ID card, much less comes from the factory as a program installed on your computer’s hard drive. The quality of a person is formed over time through very concrete aspects:

• With a sense of respect, reciprocity, empathy and consideration.
• With the good development of a strong identity, a good self-esteem that allows us to respect the identities of others.
• Human quality has a specific purpose and is none other than providing good, doing better for others through a humble, strong attitude, but always dedicated to all those around them.

Our personal story and how we face it

A person is not the result of his past but the way he faced it. A father or a mother is much more than what we see. In fact, they hide a thousand challenges overcome with a lot of courage, personal battles, some fears and endless battles won.

All of this is “added value”. It’s this energy that teaches us that to be happy it doesn’t take much: just having the people we love by our side.

With or without a partner, the most important thing is to love ourselves to love our children

Whoever is not able to love himself projects his own needs onto the other.

All these deficiencies often have serious side effects when we talk about fatherhood or motherhood.

• Parents who don’t love themselves can become controllers, thus providing a toxic upbringing.
• An unloving parent may develop an unhealthy, neurotic attachment to their partner or children. In addition to wanting to be in control, they can become suspicious, suffer great emotional ups and downs that always have serious consequences on their children’s psychological development.

love yourself to love better

Loving yourself is not an act of selfishness. This is something that should be clear from now on. We have every right to give ourselves what we deserve, to fight for what we want and to preserve our personal dignity. All of this will make us valuable people, mothers and fathers who are worthy of having children because they will always do their best.

With or without a partner, it is essential that we take care of ourselves as people. We must work on our emotional needs, insecurities and fears every day. Thus, our children will always see us as a reference person that they will imitate, in whom to look after, shelter, and learn every day.